Jury out on whether NZ-SA series is fully-fledged international cricket - Conrad

It's been 20 days since Shukri Conrad's previous press conference, and he has lost none of his quotability. If it has to be said - or even if it shouldn't be said - you would go a long way to find someone who says it better. Or, at least, more memorably.

Almost three weeks ago Conrad introduced a global audience to earthy Afrikaans words like "snotklap" and "moer" to explain South Africa's dismal failure to launch in their men's T20 World Cup semifinal.

Now he's wisecracking about the toss dictating terms, in certain conditions, in what invariably become lopsided matches. And asking out loud if international games involving weakened teams should be considered the real thing.

Considering we're dealing with South African cricket it seems important to make clear that, by using the term quotability we're not talking about quotas. What we are dealing with is Conrad's prowess at using a few choice words to hit pertinent nails bang on their heads.

Conrad was wheeled out on Tuesday to discuss South Africa's T20I series in New Zealand. The rubber will go to a deciding fifth match at Hagley Oval in Christchurch on Wednesday. There is little riding on the result in what was always going to be a lowkey affair, what with only three of the visitors' World Cup squad and eight of the New Zealanders' in the mix. That and the fact that the next World Cup in the format is almost two years away.

Nonetheless, the rubber has made for intriguingly contrasting cricket. New Zealand were rolled for 91 in the first game, only to return the favour by dismissing South Africa for 107 in the second. The home side won the third convincingly, but Conrad's side produced a gritty performance to level matters. Where had it all gone right?

"The toss hasn't played such a big part, as it might have done in previous encounters," Conrad said. Rarely can one line have dripped with so much irony and context. In case, by some remote chance, his audience didn't get the joke, he added, "Nudge, nudge..."

South Africa's last match before the current series was that sad, sorry semifinal at Eden Gardens on March 4. It was also against the Kiwis, and Mitchell Santner won the toss and chose to field, the script for the game was all but written. At least, that's the South Africans' version of events.

They floundered on a sluggish pitch and against New Zealand's canny bowling, and shambled to 77/5 before finding their way - thanks largely to Marco Jansen's unbeaten 55 off 30 - to a respectable 169/8.

But the way Jansen was able to get on top of the bowling after he took guard at the fall of the fifth wicket in the 11th told its own story. He and Tristan Stubbs hammered 73 off 48 to give their team half a chance of winning. While they deserve credit for pulling things back, the way batting conditions eased later in the innings was key.

So much so that openers Tim Seifert and Finn Allen hit 84 runs in the powerplay. South Africa managed a measly 48, and lost two wickets. Seifert and Allen shared 117 off 55, and Allen sealed New Zealand's nine-wicket win in the 13th with a meaty drive through long-off for four to reach his century off 33.

The South Africans, until then the only unbeaten team in the tournament, a distinction they earned in part through handsome victories over New Zealand, West Indies and India, slouched home bewildered. The Kiwis went to the final in Ahmedabad, where Santner again won the toss and again chose to field first. But the Indians didn't follow South Africa's lacklustre lead. Instead they roared to 255/5 and won by 96 runs.

And here South Africa are, still smarting from that disaster and likely wondering which gods they offended to be punished with a trip to play the opponents who had inflicted their latest World Cup woe. In the wake of their meltdown in the final, the New Zealanders might have the same question.

"It was always a tough one coming after a World Cup," Conrad said. "It was never about the exit [from the tournament], but a lot of people would be questioning the value of the series and why you would have it. I think we all did at some stage."

Even so, Conrad referenced the performances of Connor Esterhuizen, who made his international debut in the first match in Mount Maunganui last Sunday and is its leading runscorer with 125 in four innings. Another new face, Nqobani Mokoena, who took 3/26 in Mount Maunganui, also caught his coach's eye. As did Prenelan Subrayen, who claimed 2/13 on his debut in the format in Wellington this Sunday. Conrad gave the SA20 its due for those lesser spotted names to the fore and equipping them to "deliver the goods" at the highest level.

Then he said: "Whether it is fully-fledged international cricket, I think the jury is out on that. Many people will have their opinions on it, but as soon as you pull on that Proteas jumper - and I'm sure it's the same for the Kiwis - you represent your country and you've got to try and make them proud."

If you want the mealy-mouthed, bog standard banality of almost every cricket press conference, you know where to find it. If you want someone worth listening to, who will make you think, who you won't always agree with, whose quotes you will remember, you know where to find him, too.

He's that friendly uncle in South Africa's dressingroom. The one with eyes as sharp as his tongue, and more pithy one-liners than anyone could fit into 20 days.